When you think about great mentoring, what comes to mind? Maybe advice, answers, or someone who’s “been there, done that.” But as Julie Washington, Director of Talent Development at Serendis Leadership, reminds us, mentoring isn’t about easy answers. It’s about navigating the complexity of different perspectives. Exploring those nuanced shades of grey that are far more relatable and valuable than simple black-and-white solutions.
In a recent podcast with Serendis Founder Maud Lindley, Julie discussed how much more impactful mentoring conversations can be when mentors move beyond binary thinking.
Stepping Away from Black-and-White Thinking
Growing up, many of us were taught to see the world in clear terms: right or wrong, good or bad. Her early career in banking and traditional HR further reinforced that mindset. But when she began studying coaching and mentoring, particularly through her Masters degree in Coaching Psychology, Julie discovered something transformational: life isn’t binary. It’s made up of countless perspectives.
Impactful mentoring, Julie says, challenges us to step away from simple solutions and embrace deeper understanding. This type of understanding is not derived by mentors providing answers, but instead by creating the space to explore and consider multiple perspectives.
Listening as a Powerful Mentoring Tool
One of the most powerful tools is authentic listening. Many mentors feel pressure to deliver quick solutions or prove their worth by dispensing advice. But the greatest mentoring breakthroughs happen when mentors resist the urge to jump in. Instead, they hold space and truly listen.
As Julie puts it, mentors should allow their mentees the chance to discover their own solutions and insights. When mentors listen deeply, they help mentees uncover hidden beliefs, blind spots, and potential they may have never recognised on their own.
One powerful quotation Julie recommends mentors keep in mind, “What makes you think what you’re about to say is more important than what I’m about to think?” It’s a challenging reminder of the power mentors wield simply by providing thoughtful silence.
Embracing Authenticity and Vulnerability
Mentoring relationships that are authentic, open and vulnerable, make way for a deeper level of connection and exploration. In the corporate world, it’s easy to hide behind masks of competence and confidence. But meaningful mentoring requires genuine vulnerability from both mentor and mentee. A time to take down the mask and challenge thinking patterns and mindsets that may be stifling growth.
Julie highlights that mentors should be prepared to admit their uncertainties and struggles, and by doing this it gives mentees permission to reciprocate with their own struggles, enabling deeper conversations and genuine growth.
Balancing Questions and Perspectives
While listening and questioning are critical, Julie acknowledges there’s a delicate balance to strike. Mentors should ask questions, but they should also provide new perspectives when mentees genuinely get stuck.
The key is timing and framing. Mentors can gently offer alternative viewpoints, always leaving mentees feeling in control. Asking permission, such as, “Would it be helpful if I shared a perspective here?” helps mentees stay empowered in the mentoring relationship.
The Power of Mentoring
Working with a great mentor can help a mentee overcome deeply-held limiting beliefs to step into their full potential, ultimately embracing challenges once thought impossible. These moments reflect the true power of mentoring, when someone sees themselves clearly, sometimes for the very first time.
When mentors approach relationships with openness, curiosity, and the willingness to challenge conventional thinking, they unlock new pathways for mentees. Mentoring isn’t about being right. It’s about facilitating discovery, creating space for complexity, and empowering mentees to uncover their own insights.
At Serendis, we understand the power and impact of great mentoring. Through our structured mentoring programs, we strive to help mentors and mentees unlock richer conversations and deeper connections.
Because, as Julie’s insights remind us, mentoring isn’t about finding quick answers. It’s about exploring and embracing all the shades of grey that make us truly human.
These insights were part of a wide ranging conversation that Serendis Leadership & MentorKey Founder, Maud Lindley, covered in conversation with Julie Washington, Director Talent Development Serendis Leadership, on the Mentoring Unlocked podcast. Tune in for many more insights into how to unlock successful mentoring: https://mentorkey.com.au/podcast-mentoring-unlocked/
